btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I can't put those talents on a resume
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
