I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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