yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
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