either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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