I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize