Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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