this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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