and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
