And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
