Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
