And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
