jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Are we still banned from the library?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
