Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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