If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
