She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
