So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
