She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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