I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Randomize
