More tranny stories later!
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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