Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
