That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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