Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
