we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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