all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
