Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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