I wanna bring you to show and tell
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
