I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i barfeds in our rink
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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