"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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