i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize