but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
