like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
