out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
