it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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