she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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