White coat. Heels.
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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