Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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