Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
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