I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize