The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
