His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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