Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
