hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
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