Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
