Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Mom said you looked used
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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