that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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