Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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