Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize