I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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