Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
