So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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