He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Randomize