I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Its about making memories worth repressing
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
